I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
