super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
