it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
