she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
