I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
