I'm really into asian looking animals
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
