His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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