yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i will never coherently bang her
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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