Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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