Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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