Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
