I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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