Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Randomize
