that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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