I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize