Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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