Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
