I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
