Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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