he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
