Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Randomize
