I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
