So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
