just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
