We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize