I showed him my bush... on skype.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
