Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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