Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize