but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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