She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
