hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
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