grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize