God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
