guys are only as good as the porn they watch
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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