I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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