dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he fucked my hip out of place.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
The air taste purple.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
