My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
