i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
