Im at strip club and am horny
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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