I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Randomize
