did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
