whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
