You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
