Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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