I love black thongs
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
What a dumb baby whore.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
