Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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