What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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