White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
