I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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