I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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