i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
